Paper Work, paper work, paper work!

We have completed our first class towards our 14 hours of required Adoption Training with DSS. We went on Saturday and it was a georgous day here in South Carolina. I thought we would wish we had been out side at the park, but I would have loved to stay and ask a zillion other questions when the class was over. We complete the additional 7 hours of training next Saturday the 18th. At that time we hope to have all paperwork completed and turned in to our Case Worker. Oh yeah...about the paper work.

As with any government agency the paper work is endless! Jorge and I received about 6 more sheets of paper we had to sign or fill out before we can turn in our packet to a case worker. One was the Family History. This is a form where you write down info about your mother/father/bio-children and siblings. Ok mine took me about 5 minutes and for Jorge I had to make extra copies so he could fill out info on all his sisters and brother! Too funny! Being the youngest and male...he had no clue as to birthdays etc. Thanks to "Roachie", Margaret, for lending a hand in those dates. Next came the Foster/Adoptive parent autobiography. This one really did us in and we took two days completing it. There are questions as to how you would handle certain situations like bedwetting, runaways, aggressive behaviors, etc. To be honest so much of this is subjective and based on the age of the child you are adopting and didn't necessarily apply to us. I guess as long as we said we wouldn't lock them in a closet or beat them sensless, we're okay! We answered to the best of our knowledge and finally completed the laundry list of questions last night. I was so tired afterwards I fell into a coma status and hit the sack! Tonight we have to complete the financial portion of the paper work which includes a household budget, income statements and tax forms. I just didn't have it in me at 10pm last night to tackle this one.

The only item left to really complete is the medical exam. Yes we ALL have to go to the doctor to have them fill out a piece of paper saying we are healthy and cleared for adoption. I heard a little hesitation in Jose's voice last night as we reminded him of this. He sounded as though it was an inconvenience. He has no idea! This will be the smallest of inconveniences he will experience with a newborn or even toddler in the house! "This is rediculous! Why do I have to go?" he exclaimed as he retreated upstairs to the man cave! I am worried about this of course because I want the boys to feel a part of this process and support our decision. Jorge reminds me they are self absorbed teenagers and are only concerned about how all of this will affect them. They are not concerned with our desire to expand our family or understand our need/want to do so! He reminds me that they will grow up...live thier own lives and will be out of the house in college or working by the time our child starts school. I realize the bigger picture, but with my nature, I want them to be okay with it all. I love them and care for them so much. They are my boys, even if I didn't give birth to them. Something else to add to our prayer list! Please add this to your prayer list as well!

With all of this paper work...we needed to break it up with a fun activity so....we purchased a crib, changing table and bedding for the nursery. We painted the nursery as well and it is coming along nicely! Jorge put up the crib in no time and the changing table to boot! Gracie sat in my lap the entire time as I handed Jorge bolts, barrells and dowels. I wonder if she will realize my lap won't be as big when a baby is in it! Poor Gracie! The dogs will be much more reliant on the boys for attention once a new baby is in the picture.

So what's the next step once the medical checks are done and the paper work is turned in? We will have an inspection of our home by the Department of Health to make sure it is safe, windows are the right size for a fully dressed firefighter to get through, smoke detectors are in place and working, dogs have had their shots and are well cared for and we have a fire extinquisher in the kitchen. Not to mention cleaning supplies locked up etc... I've always been able to live with a little clutter here and there, but I know that will all have to change! Ugh! We will then be subject to a CI (Certified Investigator) completing a home study of our family. We will be asked every question under the sun, and the boys will be interviewed as well. Jorge and I are pretty open, so we don't really sweat this part. We know they have to make sure we are able to care for a child. Hello! They are giving us a human being! We're not adopting a puppy! Once this report is completed, and the CI has 90 days to complete this report, we WAIT! Wait for a call that they have a child available.

Since we are adopting from DSS, we will know everything DSS knows about this child before we choose to accept it in our home. We want our placement to be successful...so knowing as much info and asking as many questions as we can is crucial to our placement. No were not "kicking the tires" per say...but a child who has possibly been through something traumatic takes a lot of consideration. One thing we know for sure is, we may have to say NO to a child we are presented with. As hard as that seems, our family comes first! Chris and Jose come first! I would not want to take a child in that would impact our family negatively. There are no guarantees, especially with a new born, but Jorge and I have discussed what we would be willing to accept and what we wouldn't. Agreeing on that now will make it easier on us later if we have to say NO. Almost 99% of DSS adoptions are closed and we like this idea. We will not have contact with birth parents. Remember kids in the system have mostly been abused or neglected. It would not be in the best interest of a child to continue contact with the person that harmed them.

The wait will be the hardest thing. We've agreed that we will live our lives as normal, enjoy sleep while we can and keep praying God's plan comes together for us soon. We know it is all in His hands and He has a plan for us. Now is the time to be faithful when the wait will seem like an eternity.

So...that brings you up to speed. I didn't intend to write a novel today...but everyone's had so many questions and I learned so much at the first "training" class that I wanted to share. I'll keep ya'll posted!